How to not feel like shit from now till 2019
Greeting you with an affirmation:
I know that joy is rooted in perspective
and not perfection.
For me, the final laps of 2018 spell out, hand out, call out anxiety. It's when I often feel caught in barbwire, determined to march my way into the new year with confidence, yet hit with a screeching halt in order to assess what I have and haven't done in the past year.
I'd normally embrace this as tough love, but when my timeline is clogged with all sorts of conflicting personal development messages --- even with a chaser of good intentions, the taste still burns like fuck.
Now an argument could absolutely be made that I feel stung because these choice IG captions sniff out my bullshit lolol -- you know, the missing in inaction goals, unsecured bags, procrastination proclamation etc. No fiction, all facts.
I do certainly believe that truth hurts mainly because that's the only way to get our attention (and because that's the only way we'd have the 2002 R&B classic "Addicted" lmao), but I'm also concerned that these mini self-help billboards plastered all over the social media metropolitan keep us on a hamster wheel called 'not enough.'
What I'm not trying to do is sign any permission slips for us to live at our lowest potential. However, I just don't see how an emphasis on lack is going to put an emphasis on abundance. As my head was spinning yesterday, I slowed things down with this reflection I put on my Stories:
When I need a mindset reset I remember that there's nothing to prove to The Most High. I am forever valuable. Even through trial and error, our greatest energy source would never label me as damaged goods.
But if I ASK for MORE (and really, who ain't asking for something one way or another?) well then bitch there are certain things REQUIRED for more!
Look fam, whether we like it or not, emotions are part of the gig called human life. I've never heard of an earthling who abandoned all feelings and ultimately received a happy ending.
Emotions don't have to be in the driver's seat, but I don't know if they ever actually exit the car. What if that's not such a bad thing though? Maybe understanding them more would make for an easier ride.
Allllllllllll of this to say, duality gotta stay with us on the path fam. Urgent but gentle. Whole but with room to grow. Blessings here and blessings en route.
Das it <3